It probably comes as no surprise that in my family, we LOVE talking about feelings!
I do my best to narrate my own emotional landscape to help my kids understand what different feelings can look like and how they manifest. But since my 3 year olds have been really into visual aids at preschool, I decided that it was time to introduce a feelings chart.
How can a feelings chart help preschoolers build emotional intelligence?
Using a feelings chart can be a valuable tool for helping children build emotional intelligence in several ways:
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Emotional Awareness: Feeling charts provide visual representations of different emotions, helping children recognize and name their feelings. This enhances their emotional awareness, allowing them to better understand and identify their own emotions as well as the emotions of others.
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Emotional Vocabulary: By regularly referencing the feelings chart, children learn a variety of emotion words and expressions. This expands their emotional vocabulary, enabling them to communicate their feelings more effectively to others.
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Empathy and Understanding: Discussing the emotions depicted on the chart can foster empathy and understanding in children. As they learn to recognize and label emotions, they also begin to understand that others experience a range of emotions too. This cultivates empathy as they learn to consider the feelings of others in their interactions.
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Self-Regulation: Utilizing a feelings chart helps children develop self-regulation skills. By identifying their emotions and understanding their triggers, children can learn to manage their emotional responses more effectively. Over time, they develop strategies for coping with difficult emotions in healthy ways.
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Problem-Solving Skills: When children encounter challenging emotions, the feelings chart can serve as a tool for problem-solving. Caregivers or educators can guide children in identifying the source of their feelings and brainstorming appropriate ways to address them. This encourages children to develop problem-solving skills and resilience in the face of emotional challenges.
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Normalization of Emotions: Regularly using a feelings chart helps normalize the experience of having emotions. Children learn that it's okay to feel a wide range of emotions and that everyone experiences ups and downs. This can reduce feelings of shame or embarrassment associated with certain emotions and promote a more open and accepting attitude towards emotional expression.
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Building Healthy Relationships: As children become more emotionally intelligent, they are better equipped to navigate social interactions and develop positive relationships with others. They learn to recognize and respond to the emotions of their peers, fostering empathy, cooperation, and effective communication.
Using a feelings chart provides a structured and supportive way for children to develop key components of emotional intelligence, laying the foundation for healthy emotional development and well-being throughout their lives.
Why I created my own emotions chart
When I was looking for a visual aid to introduce to my kids, there were plenty of options out there but I didn't love any of them. For one thing, I'm just not a fan of the Canva clipart style that seems to be everywhere: I understand why they're so popular since they're easy to make, but I want the visual aids that I use with my kids to be ones that I enjoy looking at too!
They also all focused solely on facial expressions which felt really limiting. Not everyone expresses their emotions on their faces! Sometimes we might feel one way on the inside and look a different way on the outside! So I wanted a tool that could spark conversations about how feelings can look on our faces as well as how they can feel in our bodies and minds.
I also wanted to layer on the zones of regulation: I find this to be really helpful way to explain that sometimes really different emotions can feel similar in our bodies. Worried and excited both make it hard for me to focus because they make me feel all wibbledy wobbledy inside. But what's going on my mind is different: when I'm worried my thoughts are all tangled up and they make me feel overwhelmed or bad. When I'm excited, I still have lots of thoughts but they're clearer and they make me feel good.
I chose to focus my chart on the 6 emotions that we talk about the most: sad, calm, happy, worried, excited, and angry. While it's certainly not comprehensive, I think it's a great starting point for 2-4 year olds!
I included both keywords and symbols for the body feelings to encourage even more ways to spark conversation. There's no right or wrong way to talk about the chart so use open-ended questions and see where your child takes the conversations!
How should I introduce a feelings chart to my toddler?
Introducing an emotions chart to a toddler should be done in a simple and engaging way that captures their attention and encourages their participation. Here's a step-by-step guide:
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Choose an Appropriate Chart: Select an emotions chart that is visually appealing and age-appropriate. Look for one with clear, colorful illustrations of basic emotions like happy, sad, angry, scared, and surprised.
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Set the Stage: Find a quiet, comfortable space where you can have the toddler's full attention. Sit at their eye level to establish a connection and create a positive atmosphere for learning.
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Introduce the Concept: Begin by explaining the purpose of the emotions chart in simple language that the toddler can understand. You might say something like, "This is a special chart that helps us talk about how we're feeling."
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Show the Emotions: Point to each emotion on the chart and label it aloud. Make exaggerated facial expressions to demonstrate each emotion and encourage the toddler to mimic you.
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Share Examples: Use real-life examples to help the toddler understand each emotion. You could say, "When we're happy, we might laugh and smile like this," or "When we're sad, we might cry and want a hug."
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Encourage Participation: Invite the toddler to point to the different emotions on the chart and label them themselves. Praise their efforts and enthusiasm, even if they don't get it right every time.
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Discuss Feelings: Take turns talking about times when you or the toddler have felt each emotion. Keep the conversation light and positive, focusing on experiences that the toddler can relate to.
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Practice Using the Chart: Encourage the toddler to use the emotions chart to express how they're feeling throughout the day. Whenever they experience an emotion, prompt them to point to the corresponding picture on the chart and talk about it together.
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Make it Fun: Incorporate games, songs, or activities that involve the emotions chart to make learning about feelings enjoyable and interactive for the toddler.
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Reinforce and Repeat: Use the emotions chart regularly as part of your daily routine to reinforce learning and help the toddler become more comfortable expressing their emotions.
By introducing the emotions chart in a positive and engaging way, you can help toddlers develop their emotional vocabulary and understanding in a supportive environment.
My favorite open-ended questions to use when talking about a feelings chart
Here are a few of the questions I ask my 3 year olds when I'm using our emotions chart:
- How are you feeling right now?
- What does that feeling feel like in your body?
- What does it feel like in your mind?
- [Point at any of the faces] How do you think they're feeling?
- How do you think that emotion feels in their body?
- [Point to a non-green zone emotion] When you're feeling this way, what are some things you can do that help you get back to the green zone?